28 – Reflecting

A day for quiet contemplation.   A day for walking in the campo, reflecting on wonderful memories of my special mother on the day that would have been her 82^nd birthday.  The first one without her ….. the first of many such firsts, sadly.  Reflecting too on 2012 as it slowly disappears over the horizon.  A year of sorrow, loss, endings and beginnings.

A year when old friends have been hugely important.  I have cried on their shoulders, they have phoned just when I needed it, they have been there with coffee, cake, tissues and support.  New friends, even some as yet unmet, have also offered real kindnesses.

My walk today offers wide vistas, huge horizons, paths leading into the unknown, safe paths and rocky paths.  All the choices of which way to go are mine alone to make.   A horse gazes implacably back at me on the hillside below.  He is tethered, his choices limited.  Above, a hawk dives in and out of the clouds, turning as he wishes, his choices unlimited.  Between them I walk in the sunshine and the shade, picking my own route, my choices limited only by me, my caution, my indecision.

My chosen path disappears over the horizon.  Time to turn back?  Or to take a step onward, into the unknown?   Only a moment’s hesitation ……..

Onward.

 

 

© Tamara Essex 2012